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What the hell are you supposed to say about yourself in your profile? [pagebreak] OUT-OF-TOWN AND OUT OF TOUCH The scenario: “A guy sent me a message saying that he wanted to meet up for a drink, but when I asked when he was free, he said he was ‘going out of town’ for the next two weeks and that we should schedule something after.” — Andrea, 31 The problem..the solution: If you tell a girl you’re “going out of town,” she’s going to assume you’re busy dating other women.

By the time your date comes around, she’ll already have lost interest or have found someone more attentive.

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One girl we spoke to told a story about a guy who sent her a hilarious quote from the movie she had mentioned in her profile.

Pick something specific she wrote about herself, and ask her a follow-up about it.

You are a CUAO (Creature Unlike Any Other), remember?

You need to force yourself to refrain from saying anything too intense or negative that could scare a man away.

We came up with the idea for a self-help dating book called The Rules after many, many dinners with single girlfriends at the now-defunct Sung Chu Mein, a Chinese restaurant on the Upper East Side in New York City—it was sort of like Sex and the City, but before Sex and the City!

Like most women our age, we were career-minded with our own apartments, but we also wanted to get married.[pagebreak] INSECURE ONLINE DATERThe scenario: “It’s so annoying and a major turn-off whenever a guy has something in his profile like ‘still not sure about online dating but...’” — Randi, 25 The problem..the solution: We get it.A lot of you are self-conscious about the fact that you’re on a dating site.If you really are going away, wait until you get back to ask her out.A good rule of thumb: if you aren’t available for a date within 7 days of sending the message, don’t send it.Instead, channel your energy into meeting someone else. A general rule: once you’ve sent four messages back and forth, someone should ask someone out — preferably the man. [pagebreak] PRESSURE COOKERThe scenario: “I was really into someone I went on a few dates with, until he told me he was taking down his online dating profile and he wanted me to do the same.” — Jess, 34 The problem..the solution: Nothing will scare a girl faster than putting that kind of pressure on her too early into the relationship.

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